Approaching Women

Crash Course on Being Funny – Cocky Comedy Tips by David DeAngelo

Guys wanting dating advice are always asking me how to talk to women and how to keep the attraction going when meeting women or going on a date.  Flat out – one of the best ways to keep a woman interested is to learn how to BE FUNNY.  I always recommend my readers check out David DeAngelo’s Cocky Comedy course, but this article is going to give you seven tips right out of the Double Your Dating eBook on how to be funny.  Trust me, even YOU can do this!

Alright, so what you need to learn is how to use a few things to make quick, witty comments that will amp up her attraction.  I hear you, though, asking me how a smart-assed remark is going to make a woman attracted to you.  Trust me friend – if you want a beautiful woman, you cannot trip all over yourself like a love-sick toady.  You have to show that you are not intimidated by her and that you can take her or leave her.  A great way to do this and to display confidence is through the use of humor – not class clown humor – sharp, witty humor.

Ok, so on to the tips from David DeAngelo….

First –  You remember Joey from Friends?  Remember how Joey made the phrase “Hi – how are you?” into a sexually laden comment?  Well, you need to start doing the same sort of thing by looking for sexual innuendo in every situation and using that to charge her with trying to seduce you before you even really know her. For example, if she says, “Well, it’s getting late, and I think it’s time I head off to bed”, you say, “Bed? Already?  You haven’t even bought me dinner yet!  What would your mother say?”

Second – if someone gives a really emotional response to something, ask them, “How do you REALLY feel about it?” So one thing she could say is “I just HATE it when waiters take too long!” you ask her, “How do you REALLY feel about it?” Your sarcastic comment will bring out the ridiculousness of the heat of the remark compared to the real situation.

Third – and one of my personal favorites -exaggerate. One thing Tyler Durden used to say is “Whatever you are saying you like, say it is the “BEST ____ EVER!!”  Like, “This is the BEST SHIRT EVER!” ina  really emphatic way.  Or you can also really turn it around on a woman when she is fishing for a compliment, and she says something like “This shirt makes my boobs look too big” you can say “Well, I was not going to mention it, but I was thinking about propping a lawn chair under them to keep out of the sun today….”  Beware – you may get a solid punch for that, but its worth it.  (If she hits you, by the way, you ALWAYS smack her ass).  And if she gets violent like that – keep it up!!  You are doing it right!

The fourth thing you can do is great.  Say, “Anyway” and look away fast after making a wise-ass comment. An example – if someone says, “That guy looks like a total DORK” say, “Oh, I thought he was your twin – anyway” (look away quickly). Looking away is really important, and saying “anyway” let’s you move into another element of the conversation.  Keep your face straight, too, if you can, that always makes it even funnier.

A fifth tip on being funny from David DeAngelo – try to connect things happening around you to current events in a comical way. If a guy with a pale complexion walks by, say, “Check it out – its Edward Cullen!” If a woman starts talking about how she just bought herself a new car, say, “I hope it’s not one of those you can fold up and put in your purse….” (These may be funny now, but in a year or two no one will get them, so be sure to keep up to date on things!)

The sixth tip – always intentionally misinterpret what a woman says.  If you say, “Let’s run over to the pizza shop and grab a bite to eat ” and the girl says, “Let’s do it”, turn to her and say, “Let’s do it? You mean right here? I was hungry, but I can wait if you insist!”

The last tip is – even if you think you are hilarious, TRY not to laugh at your own jokes very often.  If you can maintain a poker face, it will make each of these situations even funnier and increase the tension.

Dating Tips for Men From David DeAngelo – Conversation Tips and How to Avoid Answering Certain Questions

Having a conversation with a woman is often one of the things that confounds a man and is a common topic for dating advice.  Some questions are a lot harder to answer than others, and some, you may not even want to answer at all.  David DeAngelo, author of Double Your Dating, addresses this in his popular eBook.  He talks about ways to keep the conversation you have with a woman fresh and interesting, as well as some ways to avoid answering questions that you may not be ready to answer.

David DeAngelo talks about his method of “Cocky Comedy” a lot in his works, and I have to admit that it is pretty damn effective.  A quick overview of the way it works is this – if you are having a conversation with a woman, whether you are on a date or trying to pick her up, one of the best ways to create attraction and sexual tension is with Cocky Comedy.  What it means is that you basically be a bit of a smart-ass and bust on her, keeping her on her toes and enlivened.  You do not compliment her – in fact, you do the opposite (of course not in a mean spirited or rude way!).  For instance, if you meet a hot woman in a bar – instead of walking up to her and asking her if you can buy her a drink and saying something stupid like, “You are the hottest woman in this bar”, you walk up to her and ask her if that purse she has doubles as a life preserver, with a smile on your face of course.  If she asks you to buy her a drink, tell her SHE can buy you on, then you will see if she is worthy enough for you to return the favor.

These are small things, but if you keep the tone light and cocky, you will have success with them.  Another facet to the conversation, however, is when a woman asks you a question you don’t really want to answer.  We all know the ones that make us groan, like…

“Are you seeing anyone else right now?”

“Do you love me?”

“Where were you last night, I tried to call you.”

“Why didn’t you call me?”

If you want to deal with these types of questions in dating or relationships with women, one of the best ways is to use what David DeAngelo calls Evasive Action.  It goes something like this (Double Your Dating, p 94) …

Say she asks: “Are you seeing other women?”

You answer: “No… other men.”

Get it?

Here’s another one:

She asks: “Do you love me?”

You answer: “Of course… as a friend.”

And another:

She asks: “Where were you last night? I called.”

You answer: “I was home thinking about you… but since you didn’t call early enough, I went out and hired ten strippers.

At first, I figured that this tactic wouldn’t work. But then I tried using it a few times, and behold, it worked in almost every situation.

And if she pushes and asks again: “Cum’mon, seriously…”

You say: “No, seriously. I was home thinking about you… OK, OK, you got me. I really went out with ten other women. Are you happy? What, are you feeling insecure?”

If you keep it up, they’ll give up.

Make sure you don’t act busted or nervous and it will work for you, too. Remember, women can take hints very well, and if they think that there’s an answer that they don’t want to hear, they’ll give up and stop asking.

How to Attract Women Instead of Cold Calling Them – Ideas from David DeAngelo

Attracting women is the number one thing on the minds of single men across the world.  How to attract them is the biggest question – what works?  Well, David DeAngelo says that women are attracted to men for certain, specific reasons.  He calls it a “code” in his Double Your Dating eBook, and says, “Once you know what it is, you can develop a method to follow this sequence.  You can use the fact that there is a ‘genetic mating sequence’ to help you.” (p. 48).

So what are the specific ingredients that make up this code or sequence, you ask?  It boils down to being different than the other men – different in an attractive and confident way.

So here are some specific things that you can do to make yourself MORE attractive to women.  After all, it’s much easier to date a woman who is already attracted to you by your behavior than to try to MAKE a woman attracted to you – which backfires with relentless accuracy.  Think of it like cold calling verses selling something to someone who already WANTS your product.

First of all – you need to get rid of the neediness and insecurity in your life.  WOMEN. HATE. THIS.  You will not attract a woman by trying to get attention, showing off or trying to get recognition from her.   In Double Your Dating, David DeAngelo says that “Insecurity and neediness are like hemlock and arsenic – either will kill your attractiveness when dealing with women” (p 49).

How do you project neediness and insecurity?  Insecurity shows up when a man does not feel comfortable with who he is or comfortable in a given situation. He acts tentative, weak, and unsure. He tries to put on a show of confidence which is obviously fake.   He says things that are out of place in an attempt to get approval.  Women have a RADAR for this.  They detect – then they AVOID.

So avoid the following behaviors:

•   Hanging on a woman. Don’t touch a woman or crowd her too much in the beginning.   Instead, lean back and let her become comfortable being around you.

•   Talking or saying negative things about women or past girlfriends. If you talk too much about past girlfriends or other women, or say negative things about them, a woman will judge you to be insecure.

•   Having emotional responses to things. If it’s obvious to a woman that you easily get upset about things, then she will judge you to be insecure or even dangerous.  Women do not like tantrums, so if you throw things, scream and swear when you are mad – you are going to be even madder when she dumps you like last week’s garbage for someone a little more mature and stable.

•   Looking to others to make decisions. Women like it when you decide what’s going to happen and then do it. If you are always asking, “Well, what you think I should do?”, “Where do you want to go tonight?”, and “What do you want?” you’ll come off as needy.  Just make decisions and go with it. If she has a different idea, she’ll let you know.

•   Saying or doing things just to be noticed or to get compliments.  ‘Nuff said.  Don’t do it.

•   Arguing. This is my favorite. Some people feel like they need to argue with EVERYTHING. If you’re one of these people, just realize that this is a clear demonstration that you’re insecure and needy. u may always be right, but being overly argumentative is bad for your sex life. Deal with it.

So, if you can avoid these behaviors and take David DeAngelo’s advice, you will find it much easier to project a healthy, confident demeanor that women will find very attractive.  Be relaxed, confident, stand straight and put your shoulders back, look her in the eye, be decisive and bust on her a bit (using Cocky Funny) and you will find that your “cold calling” days are over, and your dating life has really begun.

Dating Advice for Men from David DeAngelo – Learn What Women Want or Fail

In order to be more successful with women and dating, a man must first learn to understand (as best he can) the inner workings of the female mind – what motivates women, what they need and want, how they think and how they feel.  All these things, according to Double Your Dating author David DeAngelo, are critical to creating your own success with women.

One of the first mistakes that men often make in trying to get a girlfriend is that they assume that they know how a woman thinks because they assume that women think similarly to men.  And no – I am not being sarcastic or dogging on women here -  but the truth is that just as our physical bodies are different, our emotional and logical make-up is different as well.

What women want, according to David DeAngelo, may make no sense to us as men at all.  He says in Double Your Dating, “Almost none of what I do to be successful with women makes any sense to me logically, because I’m not a woman. But now that I see that what I do works over and over again, I realize that it doesn’t matter what makes sense.   All that matters is WHAT WORKS” (p 15).

Did you know that it is the female, most of the time, in nature that selects the male?  This is one of the reasons that the alpha male concept developed.  The female selects the male based on a genetic need to create strong, viable offspring that are one step closer to the penultimate of the species (look up Darwin if you want more on that).  And most of the time in the human race, this happens as well.  Women are used to being the ones that choose.

But – what if the tables were turned?  What if you were the one doing the choosing?  Do you think that would give a woman a different experience?  A new feeling?

Maybe it would make you … stand out a little?

Well duh.  Ya.

“Sooooooo…. It’s good to address this issue and point out when talking to women (even if you hint at it and talk about past experiences to make the point) that you are the selector and not the selectee. This kind of thing is very powerful, as it does one of my favorite things: It points out something to the woman that she’s most likely NEVER HEARD FROM A MAN IN HER ENTIFE LIFE. I specialize in saying things that women have never heard. I also like to say things that she’s never heard that MAKE ME DIFFERENT IN A DESIRABLE WAY” (David DeAngelo, Double Your Dating, p 16).

You can even SAY IT to a woman – tell her that you are going to tell her something about herself that no one has ever told her – it will get her attention and interest right up.  And if what you tell her is profound enough – she is going to start to see you as the kind of man she needs to compete for.  (And if you are sitting there thinking “But what do I SAY??” do some research!  Look up interesting facts about the human psyche, the body, the mind – get some KNOWLEDGE on my friend!)

To me, this kind of philosophy is different than what a lot of the “dating gurus” teach.  Many just teach you how to pick up women.  That’s not the point here.   The point is – you probably want a girlfriend, right?  Or maybe eventually a wife or partner in your life?  Well, this is the way to get your foot in the door and start meeting some women and getting some CHOICES.  And by going about it from an intellectual standpoint, you can enrich HER life as well as your own.  That’s a win for both of you.

Here is a GREAT example that David D gives in the Double Your Dating ebook…

One good example is to say to a hot woman who’s acting arrogant, “You don’t have me fooled for a minute, dear.”  When she says, “What are you talking about?”, you say, “Well, I know that most men fall for this ‘I’m beautiful and aloof and I get my way’ part of your personality… but I know something that none of them know… that there’s really another side of you. A side that none of THEM get to see. I’ll bet you a dollar right now that I know something about you that no one who’s only known you for 5 minutes has EVER known… <pause pause pause>… You may act tough, but you’re actually EXTREMELY sensitive on the inside. If someone makes a negative comment to you, you might act like it doesn’t bother you… but you’ll think about it all the way home…I know that secretly you’re as sensitive as a little girl…it’s just that most people never get to meet that part of you…(p 16).

This will throw her off balance and let her know that you are keen and observant, as well as much deeper than most of the dumb jocks throwing back Budweisers at the bar.  But don’t stop there – keep talking to her and drop a bit more knowledge on her and see how she responds.  Chances are she will be chasing YOU by the end of the night.

Inside the Mind of a Woman – How To Attract Her

You know, I get a lot of dating questions from guys wondering why the heck women dress so sexy to go out, go to a bar, whatever, but then seem SO unapproachable and aloof.  It’s like she has dressed herself all up just to say, “Look, but you can’t touch!”  Have you ever felt that way?

Did you realize, though, that if you want to give dating tips for men, you have to actually learn to think like a woman?  It’s scary, man, not everyone can go there.  But I have a good therapist.

Well, from a woman’s perspective, an attractive woman does not really need to dress up to get a man’s attention.  However, it makes her FEEL good to do so, to look her best, and let’s admit it, guys – to look better than the other women there.  Sometimes you feel like you are in a lioness’ den when you walk into a place like that, where all the beautiful women are either in a group – or trying to pretend the others don’t exist.

Ok – so let’s quickly go through a couple of the real reasons women do that.

First – any woman wants to increase her assets.  She wants to be of a higher quality, in order to attract the highest quality man.  She wants that Alpha Male who can do all the right things for her – protect her, provide for her, make her feel the way she wants to feel, etc.

Second, she wants to crush the competition.  Hot women are COMPETITIVE.  They know the location of every other babe in the room, they know what she has her beat in and what the other woman posses that she wants.  It’s like a pack of she-wolves circling, except it’s all done without teeth baring and snarling.  Usually.

Third – she want to get the most attention and approval.  It’s true – they want attention – like little kids.  They look aloof and unapproachable because they are actually, underneath, insecure and don’t want to get hurt, and hoping the right man will approach them.

Do you want to be the right man?  Do you realize that choice is not made because of how you look?

Do you understand how this all has to do with basic human evolution and the need for the species to survive?

Look at it like this.  I am sure you have heard of Darwin’s theory the “survival of the fittest”.  It means the animals with the best genes reproduce.  The weak ones get killed.  The species evolves stronger and more intelligent with each generation.

So when you look at the attention an attractive woman wants, it is, in the basest of terms, her way of projecting her worthiness to carry on the genes, to be selected.  Do you see what I am getting at?  She wants to be the Alpha Female.

So if YOU, as a man, want to hook up with the Alpha Female – guess who you gotta be?  Right.  The Alpha Male.    Now, one more question.  What does the Alpha Female ALWAYS get from men?  Attention.  What does she want?  Attention.  What do you need to give her?

If you said attention, smack yourself in the head.

If you’re a beautiful woman who is always getting attention and approval from men and you meet a man who DOESN’T give you that attention and approval, it has an INSTANT and POWERFUL impact.

Furthermore, if the man you’re interacting with actively AVOIDS giving you attention… and gives you DISAPPROVAL, it can have the effect of instantly SCRAMBLING YOUR SYSTEMS.

Again, attractive women don’t meet a lot of guys that could care less about her beauty.   If you want to learn how to ATTRACT these “unusually beautiful” women, then you need to get a clue about what creates the idea in her mind that YOU are one of the most “desirable” men.

And how can you do that?  A.  Is it hitting the lottery and becoming a millionaire?  B.  Getting plastic surgery to look like John  Cena?  Or possibly learning to trigger the ATTRACTION in her?

I personally like the third one myself.  You?

Here’s the interesting thing about triggering attraction that I LOVE.  Once you do it, once you get it right, she cannot help herself.  I mean, can you?  When you are really attracted to someone, can you turn it off?  Nope.

Ok, shut up and tell me how to do this, right?  Right.  Ok- get into her head.  You are GORGEOUS, every man in there wants to buy you a drink, give you a compliment, and throw his coat on the puddle for you to walk over.  Gag.  It gets old.  So – you meet a guy who doesn’t offer you a drink.  Maybe he even asks HER to buy him a drink.  He bust on her, tells her how weird her shoes are says something like, “That is the UGLIEST DRESS I have ever seen!” in a fun and teasing way.  (Don’t spit on it or anything dude, ok?).  Have you heard of Cocky Comedy?  That’s what that basically is.

What are you?  You are not impressed by her beauty.  You are not groveling at her feet.  You are not showing her that you are attracted to her.  In fact – you are testing HER.

“Hmmmm…” she thinks.  “That’s different!”  And pretty soon, SHE starts feeling attraction toward YOU because you are showing her that you are the ALPHA MALE and you are ABOVE her.  If she wants you, she’s gotta work for it.  And she NEVER has to work for it.  So now she wants it.

Are you following me?

Good.  This is the first step toward becoming that Alpha Male that you need to be.  I can’t tell you everything there is about it in one short article, but I do have some recommendations for you for further study.  Go check out David Deangelo’s Double Your Dating eBook (Dude, it’s the best $20 you will ever spend) or his Cocky Comedy program.  These are priceless if you want to learn to beat gorgeous women at their own game.