Alright, so what you need to learn is how to use a few things to make quick, witty comments that will amp up her attraction.  I hear you, though, asking me how a smart-assed remark is going to make a woman attracted to you.  Trust me friend – if you want a beautiful woman, you cannot trip all over yourself like a love-sick toady.  You have to show that you are not intimidated by her and that you can take her or leave her.  A great way to do this and to display confidence is through the use of humor – not class clown humor – sharp, witty humor.

Ok, so on to the tips from David DeAngelo….

First –  You remember Joey from Friends?  Remember how Joey made the phrase “Hi – how are you?” into a sexually laden comment?  Well, you need to start doing the same sort of thing by looking for sexual innuendo in every situation and using that to charge her with trying to seduce you before you even really know her. For example, if she says, “Well, it’s getting late, and I think it’s time I head off to bed”, you say, “Bed? Already?  You haven’t even bought me dinner yet!  What would your mother say?”

Second – if someone gives a really emotional response to something, ask them, “How do you REALLY feel about it?” So one thing she could say is “I just HATE it when waiters take too long!” you ask her, “How do you REALLY feel about it?” Your sarcastic comment will bring out the ridiculousness of the heat of the remark compared to the real situation.

Third – and one of my personal favorites -exaggerate. One thing Tyler Durden used to say is “Whatever you are saying you like, say it is the “BEST ____ EVER!!”  Like, “This is the BEST SHIRT EVER!” ina  really emphatic way.  Or you can also really turn it around on a woman when she is fishing for a compliment, and she says something like “This shirt makes my boobs look too big” you can say “Well, I was not going to mention it, but I was thinking about propping a lawn chair under them to keep out of the sun today….”  Beware – you may get a solid punch for that, but its worth it.  (If she hits you, by the way, you ALWAYS smack her ass).  And if she gets violent like that – keep it up!!  You are doing it right!

The fourth thing you can do is great.  Say, “Anyway” and look away fast after making a wise-ass comment. An example – if someone says, “That guy looks like a total DORK” say, “Oh, I thought he was your twin – anyway” (look away quickly). Looking away is really important, and saying “anyway” let’s you move into another element of the conversation.  Keep your face straight, too, if you can, that always makes it even funnier.

A fifth tip on being funny from David DeAngelo – try to connect things happening around you to current events in a comical way. If a guy with a pale complexion walks by, say, “Check it out – its Edward Cullen!” If a woman starts talking about how she just bought herself a new car, say, “I hope it’s not one of those you can fold up and put in your purse….” (These may be funny now, but in a year or two no one will get them, so be sure to keep up to date on things!)

The sixth tip – always intentionally misinterpret what a woman says.  If you say, “Let’s run over to the pizza shop and grab a bite to eat ” and the girl says, “Let’s do it”, turn to her and say, “Let’s do it? You mean right here? I was hungry, but I can wait if you insist!”

The last tip is – even if you think you are hilarious, TRY not to laugh at your own jokes very often.  If you can maintain a poker face, it will make each of these situations even funnier and increase the tension.

David DeAngelo talks about his method of “Cocky Comedy” a lot in his works, and I have to admit that it is pretty damn effective.  A quick overview of the way it works is this – if you are having a conversation with a woman, whether you are on a date or trying to pick her up, one of the best ways to create attraction and sexual tension is with Cocky Comedy.  What it means is that you basically be a bit of a smart-ass and bust on her, keeping her on her toes and enlivened.  You do not compliment her – in fact, you do the opposite (of course not in a mean spirited or rude way!).  For instance, if you meet a hot woman in a bar – instead of walking up to her and asking her if you can buy her a drink and saying something stupid like, “You are the hottest woman in this bar”, you walk up to her and ask her if that purse she has doubles as a life preserver, with a smile on your face of course.  If she asks you to buy her a drink, tell her SHE can buy you on, then you will see if she is worthy enough for you to return the favor.

These are small things, but if you keep the tone light and cocky, you will have success with them.  Another facet to the conversation, however, is when a woman asks you a question you don’t really want to answer.  We all know the ones that make us groan, like…

“Are you seeing anyone else right now?”

“Do you love me?”

“Where were you last night, I tried to call you.”

“Why didn’t you call me?”

If you want to deal with these types of questions in dating or relationships with women, one of the best ways is to use what David DeAngelo calls Evasive Action.  It goes something like this (Double Your Dating, p 94) …

Say she asks: “Are you seeing other women?”

You answer: “No… other men.”

Get it?

Here’s another one:

She asks: “Do you love me?”

You answer: “Of course… as a friend.”

And another:

She asks: “Where were you last night? I called.”

You answer: “I was home thinking about you… but since you didn’t call early enough, I went out and hired ten strippers.

At first, I figured that this tactic wouldn’t work. But then I tried using it a few times, and behold, it worked in almost every situation.

And if she pushes and asks again: “Cum’mon, seriously…”

You say: “No, seriously. I was home thinking about you… OK, OK, you got me. I really went out with ten other women. Are you happy? What, are you feeling insecure?”

If you keep it up, they’ll give up.

Make sure you don’t act busted or nervous and it will work for you, too. Remember, women can take hints very well, and if they think that there’s an answer that they don’t want to hear, they’ll give up and stop asking.

So what are the specific ingredients that make up this code or sequence, you ask?  It boils down to being different than the other men – different in an attractive and confident way.

So here are some specific things that you can do to make yourself MORE attractive to women.  After all, it’s much easier to date a woman who is already attracted to you by your behavior than to try to MAKE a woman attracted to you – which backfires with relentless accuracy.  Think of it like cold calling verses selling something to someone who already WANTS your product.

First of all – you need to get rid of the neediness and insecurity in your life.  WOMEN. HATE. THIS.  You will not attract a woman by trying to get attention, showing off or trying to get recognition from her.   In Double Your Dating, David DeAngelo says that “Insecurity and neediness are like hemlock and arsenic – either will kill your attractiveness when dealing with women” (p 49).

How do you project neediness and insecurity?  Insecurity shows up when a man does not feel comfortable with who he is or comfortable in a given situation. He acts tentative, weak, and unsure. He tries to put on a show of confidence which is obviously fake.   He says things that are out of place in an attempt to get approval.  Women have a RADAR for this.  They detect – then they AVOID.

So avoid the following behaviors:

•   Hanging on a woman. Don’t touch a woman or crowd her too much in the beginning.   Instead, lean back and let her become comfortable being around you.

•   Talking or saying negative things about women or past girlfriends. If you talk too much about past girlfriends or other women, or say negative things about them, a woman will judge you to be insecure.

•   Having emotional responses to things. If it’s obvious to a woman that you easily get upset about things, then she will judge you to be insecure or even dangerous.  Women do not like tantrums, so if you throw things, scream and swear when you are mad – you are going to be even madder when she dumps you like last week’s garbage for someone a little more mature and stable.

•   Looking to others to make decisions. Women like it when you decide what’s going to happen and then do it. If you are always asking, “Well, what you think I should do?”, “Where do you want to go tonight?”, and “What do you want?” you’ll come off as needy.  Just make decisions and go with it. If she has a different idea, she’ll let you know.

•   Saying or doing things just to be noticed or to get compliments.  ‘Nuff said.  Don’t do it.

•   Arguing. This is my favorite. Some people feel like they need to argue with EVERYTHING. If you’re one of these people, just realize that this is a clear demonstration that you’re insecure and needy. u may always be right, but being overly argumentative is bad for your sex life. Deal with it.

So, if you can avoid these behaviors and take David DeAngelo’s advice, you will find it much easier to project a healthy, confident demeanor that women will find very attractive.  Be relaxed, confident, stand straight and put your shoulders back, look her in the eye, be decisive and bust on her a bit (using Cocky Funny) and you will find that your “cold calling” days are over, and your dating life has really begun.

One of the first mistakes that men often make in trying to get a girlfriend is that they assume that they know how a woman thinks because they assume that women think similarly to men.  And no – I am not being sarcastic or dogging on women here -  but the truth is that just as our physical bodies are different, our emotional and logical make-up is different as well.

What women want, according to David DeAngelo, may make no sense to us as men at all.  He says in Double Your Dating, “Almost none of what I do to be successful with women makes any sense to me logically, because I’m not a woman. But now that I see that what I do works over and over again, I realize that it doesn’t matter what makes sense.   All that matters is WHAT WORKS” (p 15).

Did you know that it is the female, most of the time, in nature that selects the male?  This is one of the reasons that the alpha male concept developed.  The female selects the male based on a genetic need to create strong, viable offspring that are one step closer to the penultimate of the species (look up Darwin if you want more on that).  And most of the time in the human race, this happens as well.  Women are used to being the ones that choose.

But – what if the tables were turned?  What if you were the one doing the choosing?  Do you think that would give a woman a different experience?  A new feeling?

Maybe it would make you … stand out a little?

Well duh.  Ya.

“Sooooooo…. It’s good to address this issue and point out when talking to women (even if you hint at it and talk about past experiences to make the point) that you are the selector and not the selectee. This kind of thing is very powerful, as it does one of my favorite things: It points out something to the woman that she’s most likely NEVER HEARD FROM A MAN IN HER ENTIFE LIFE. I specialize in saying things that women have never heard. I also like to say things that she’s never heard that MAKE ME DIFFERENT IN A DESIRABLE WAY” (David DeAngelo, Double Your Dating, p 16).

You can even SAY IT to a woman – tell her that you are going to tell her something about herself that no one has ever told her – it will get her attention and interest right up.  And if what you tell her is profound enough – she is going to start to see you as the kind of man she needs to compete for.  (And if you are sitting there thinking “But what do I SAY??” do some research!  Look up interesting facts about the human psyche, the body, the mind – get some KNOWLEDGE on my friend!)

To me, this kind of philosophy is different than what a lot of the “dating gurus” teach.  Many just teach you how to pick up women.  That’s not the point here.   The point is – you probably want a girlfriend, right?  Or maybe eventually a wife or partner in your life?  Well, this is the way to get your foot in the door and start meeting some women and getting some CHOICES.  And by going about it from an intellectual standpoint, you can enrich HER life as well as your own.  That’s a win for both of you.

Here is a GREAT example that David D gives in the Double Your Dating ebook…

One good example is to say to a hot woman who’s acting arrogant, “You don’t have me fooled for a minute, dear.”  When she says, “What are you talking about?”, you say, “Well, I know that most men fall for this ‘I’m beautiful and aloof and I get my way’ part of your personality… but I know something that none of them know… that there’s really another side of you. A side that none of THEM get to see. I’ll bet you a dollar right now that I know something about you that no one who’s only known you for 5 minutes has EVER known… <pause pause pause>… You may act tough, but you’re actually EXTREMELY sensitive on the inside. If someone makes a negative comment to you, you might act like it doesn’t bother you… but you’ll think about it all the way home…I know that secretly you’re as sensitive as a little girl…it’s just that most people never get to meet that part of you…(p 16).

This will throw her off balance and let her know that you are keen and observant, as well as much deeper than most of the dumb jocks throwing back Budweisers at the bar.  But don’t stop there – keep talking to her and drop a bit more knowledge on her and see how she responds.  Chances are she will be chasing YOU by the end of the night.

Did you realize, though, that if you want to give dating tips for men, you have to actually learn to think like a woman?  It’s scary, man, not everyone can go there.  But I have a good therapist.

Well, from a woman’s perspective, an attractive woman does not really need to dress up to get a man’s attention.  However, it makes her FEEL good to do so, to look her best, and let’s admit it, guys – to look better than the other women there.  Sometimes you feel like you are in a lioness’ den when you walk into a place like that, where all the beautiful women are either in a group – or trying to pretend the others don’t exist.

Ok – so let’s quickly go through a couple of the real reasons women do that.

First – any woman wants to increase her assets.  She wants to be of a higher quality, in order to attract the highest quality man.  She wants that Alpha Male who can do all the right things for her – protect her, provide for her, make her feel the way she wants to feel, etc.

Second, she wants to crush the competition.  Hot women are COMPETITIVE.  They know the location of every other babe in the room, they know what she has her beat in and what the other woman posses that she wants.  It’s like a pack of she-wolves circling, except it’s all done without teeth baring and snarling.  Usually.

Third – she want to get the most attention and approval.  It’s true – they want attention – like little kids.  They look aloof and unapproachable because they are actually, underneath, insecure and don’t want to get hurt, and hoping the right man will approach them.

Do you want to be the right man?  Do you realize that choice is not made because of how you look?

Do you understand how this all has to do with basic human evolution and the need for the species to survive?

Look at it like this.  I am sure you have heard of Darwin’s theory the “survival of the fittest”.  It means the animals with the best genes reproduce.  The weak ones get killed.  The species evolves stronger and more intelligent with each generation.

So when you look at the attention an attractive woman wants, it is, in the basest of terms, her way of projecting her worthiness to carry on the genes, to be selected.  Do you see what I am getting at?  She wants to be the Alpha Female.

So if YOU, as a man, want to hook up with the Alpha Female – guess who you gotta be?  Right.  The Alpha Male.    Now, one more question.  What does the Alpha Female ALWAYS get from men?  Attention.  What does she want?  Attention.  What do you need to give her?

If you said attention, smack yourself in the head.

If you’re a beautiful woman who is always getting attention and approval from men and you meet a man who DOESN’T give you that attention and approval, it has an INSTANT and POWERFUL impact.

Furthermore, if the man you’re interacting with actively AVOIDS giving you attention… and gives you DISAPPROVAL, it can have the effect of instantly SCRAMBLING YOUR SYSTEMS.

Again, attractive women don’t meet a lot of guys that could care less about her beauty.   If you want to learn how to ATTRACT these “unusually beautiful” women, then you need to get a clue about what creates the idea in her mind that YOU are one of the most “desirable” men.

And how can you do that?  A.  Is it hitting the lottery and becoming a millionaire?  B.  Getting plastic surgery to look like John  Cena?  Or possibly learning to trigger the ATTRACTION in her?

I personally like the third one myself.  You?

Here’s the interesting thing about triggering attraction that I LOVE.  Once you do it, once you get it right, she cannot help herself.  I mean, can you?  When you are really attracted to someone, can you turn it off?  Nope.

Ok, shut up and tell me how to do this, right?  Right.  Ok- get into her head.  You are GORGEOUS, every man in there wants to buy you a drink, give you a compliment, and throw his coat on the puddle for you to walk over.  Gag.  It gets old.  So – you meet a guy who doesn’t offer you a drink.  Maybe he even asks HER to buy him a drink.  He bust on her, tells her how weird her shoes are says something like, “That is the UGLIEST DRESS I have ever seen!” in a fun and teasing way.  (Don’t spit on it or anything dude, ok?).  Have you heard of Cocky Comedy?  That’s what that basically is.

What are you?  You are not impressed by her beauty.  You are not groveling at her feet.  You are not showing her that you are attracted to her.  In fact – you are testing HER.

“Hmmmm…” she thinks.  “That’s different!”  And pretty soon, SHE starts feeling attraction toward YOU because you are showing her that you are the ALPHA MALE and you are ABOVE her.  If she wants you, she’s gotta work for it.  And she NEVER has to work for it.  So now she wants it.

Are you following me?

Good.  This is the first step toward becoming that Alpha Male that you need to be.  I can’t tell you everything there is about it in one short article, but I do have some recommendations for you for further study.  Go check out David Deangelo’s Double Your Dating eBook (Dude, it’s the best $20 you will ever spend) or his Cocky Comedy program.  These are priceless if you want to learn to beat gorgeous women at their own game.

Have you ever heard a woman ask the question, “Where have all the real men gone?”  I know, you want to just shake her and ask her what the HELL she is talking about, right?  Well, the thing is – it seems that this “sensitive revolution” has basically neutered the male population.

Some people attribute that to the fact that more and more men are being raised by single women.  Others say that we are all doing it to ourselves – taking everything out of life that might accidentally offend an individual’s beliefs – trying to neuter EVERYTHING (like taking “God” out of the pledge of allegiance, taking the discipline out of schools and making sure everything that we say is politically correct to name a few methods).

Whatever you believe – it’s happening.  Society is turning Namby Pamby – and the women are the ones voicing it, asking where all the real men have gone.   To try to find a REAL man, women have developed a screening process – a test, if you will, to see if a man is a real man, or a wuss in man’s clothing.

You’ll notice women doing this when they are exploring the possibility of a relationship with you – like on a first date, or when things begin to become intimate.  This is how the beautiful women separate the men from the boys.  She is trying to find out, basically, if you are an alpha male.

There are many forms tests can take, of course, but once you are familiar with a few of them, you will be able to recognize them for what they are, and PASS them.  She might ask you for a gift or something she wants.  She could act snotty or have a tantrum, to see what she can get away with, or cancel your plans without notice to see what you do.  She might even tell you that you are annoying her to see if you will change your behavior.  (By the way, I learned all this by watching David DeAngelo‘s program called On Being a Man!)

Now – these things may seem small to you.  However, to a woman, they are CRITICAL.  If you fail one of these tests, she is going to do one of two things – she is going to realize you are a wuss and not a real man and will walk all over you until she gets bored with you and then she will leave, or she will just realize you are a wuss and leave then.

So – how do you pass these tests and show her you are an alpha male?  Well, let’s imagine for a moment that you are a wolf – the leader of the pack, the alpha male who gets ALL the females in the pack.  If a female wolf came up tot eh alpha male and said, “Buy me this pretty trinket and I will give you the night of your life…” – what do you think he would do?  Would he go running off to the nearest wolf jewelry store and buy it?  Or would he laugh and say “Are you serious???  I hope not, because if you have not noticed, there are plenty of females in this pack besides you.”

Or, say for instance, one of the female wolves tells the alpha male that she is annoyed by something he does.  Does the alpha wolf say “OMG I am SO sorry!  I won’t EVER do that again!”   (I actually can see David DeAngelo cringing at that, sorry man!)  Uhhhhh – NO.  He will give her a playful smile and say, “Oh REALLY?” – and then he will do it again just to show her that she is not the alpha – HE IS.

And guys – this is IMPORTANT.  Women talk about Prince Charming – how they just KNOW he is out there and what all he will do for them.  But did you ever notice that Prince Charming has to know how to fight, how to keep the kingdom running, sweep her off her feet and take her to a destination of HIS choosing?  Prince Charming does not ask the Princess if she would like to be rescued today.  He takes charge and DOES IT, and she will follow.  If you want to learn more about being an alpha male, then take a look at David DeAngelo’s program, On Being a Man, and start giving women what they really want.

Let’s continue:

Remember when you were just an eight-year-old kid on the playground? There were all these ‘strange’ creatures playing around the sandbox. They were called girls, and they seemed so bizarre and foreign to you. They were delicate and interesting in a way that you couldn’t quite explain, but you knew that they were different.

How do kids treat those that are different? They tease them.

“Mary, Mary, she’s so hairy!”
“Where’d you get that backpack? Looks like a hunchback!”
“Jenny’s got a CARROT top!”

Boys teased girls. Girls teased boys. Everyone made fun of everyone else. It was sandlot politics at its best, and you learned very quickly that you had to develop a callus to the teasing, or you’d get bruised pretty badly. (Some kids never adjusted, and grew up with their own sandbox issues.)

Ah, what fun those days were.
Well, sort of.

We learned some very primitive social interactions there, but the principles still held for many of us. (Hey, whether or not you like it, we’re a lot closer to those kids in the playground than the adults you think we are. Everyone is still a little kid inside.)

I’ll be willing to bet you that you teased more girls because you liked them than you did because of any genuine weirdness. Sure, there’s some cruelty, but the first social interaction most boys have with girls is when they teased them mercilessly. And what happened? The girls stuck up for themselves. They teased back. And they didn’t realize it at the time, but this set in motion a whole pattern of behavior that led to them being very interested and attracted when they are CHALLENGED.

That’s right, boys. Teasing is all about raising the stakes of challenge to her, and letting her know that you don’t get all mushy inside when you get near a girl. No confidence = no attraction from her.

Tease to Please is a simple strategy. By teasing, you emulate a lot of the self-confidence you need to demonstrate with a woman. That’s really the secret in a nutshell. Call it what you want, Cocky and funny, confident and humorous, Tease to Please. You are showing her you have the balls to not roll over and pant like a whipped dog every time a woman comes near you.

Here’s how you do it:
When we left off, you’d just delivered your introduction. Now you are in a position to continue the conversation as you see fit. You’ve disarmed her natural defenses and opened up your opportunity to engage her attraction mechanism. You do this through Teasing.

Here’s one of the examples we used last time:

Example: She’s got bright red shoes on.

YOU: “Wow, those are … interesting shoes. My sister might like a pair like that. Where’d you get them…?”
HER: “Oh, these? Uhm, I got them at Macy’s. They’re really old. I was looking to get a new pair.”
YOU: “Well, my sister is pretty young, but she’d like that style. For an OLD lady … (PAUSE) … you’re a pretty sharp dresser.” You give her a SLIGHT smile that says “That was a joke.”

Remember, “sister” can be changed to aunt, or cousin, or whatever. You can use my standard response I gave you for now, but you’ll do better if you learn how to think on your feet and come up with more personal and customized versions. There are a whole host of teasing responses. Here are some others (delivered with that sly smile):

“Well, with heels that high, you better watch out for awnings. And low-flying planes.”
“How many feet have you crushed with those things? I’m wearing steel-toes, so don’t try it on me.”

Let’s say it’s about a ring she’s wearing:
“Well, my sister likes those ‘groovy’ rings, too. Do you have a mood ring? I bet you were the kind of girl to wear one of those. Was it blue all the time? You look like you have cold hands.”
“My sister likes toe rings like that. Do you wear them on your toes, too? Just don’t tell me you have a weird piercing, like your butt-cheek. That would just be TOO freaky.”
“Wow, that thing is HUGE. I bet you have to leave it off when you go swimming, huh? Or else you’d sink right to the bottom.”

It goes on and on. In fact, you could sit down and just think up a handful of these for a few different items of clothing (shoes, purse, jacket) and/or jewelry and be set for almost ANY encounter.

Doesn’t it feel great to know that you can now control your meetings and increase your ratios?
No, no, please, hold your applause…

Remember: Don’t be insulting. Be TEASING. Teasing is done with a tongue-in-cheek sense of humor. You kid with her. If you make fun of her in a mean or malicious way, you’re out. If you don’t let her know you’re kidding, you’re out.

The point of all this is to:
A) Get her laughing
B) Challenge her (by demonstrating Self-confidence and that you’re DIFFERENT.)

After you joke with her a little, make a decision if this is a woman you might be interested in. If so, you smile and start to walk away. Then, turn right back and TELL her (don’t ask):

“Hey, you know, we might like to continue this conversation sometime. Write down your number for me.” (Memorize this phrasing to use.)

An alternate approach: “Hey, you know, I might like to continue this conversation sometime. Write down your email address for me.”

If she says she doesn’t have a pen, you DO, and hand it to her. If she says she doesn’t have email, tease her some more: “No email? You didn’t just get off a desert island did you?” Smile. “Here, just give me your home phone.” (As she starts writing): “Uhm, your REAL number. I’m just going to call you as soon as I get home and leave a dozen annoying messages on your answering machine.” Smile. Take her number and leave. Don’t tell her you’ll call. Leave her wondering.

That’s it. You disarm her defenses by keeping a sense of humor. You show self confidence and challenge her by teasing a little. Then you ask for what you want, and then you leave. You’re a busy guy, with a busy schedule of too many women to meet.

This completes your education on the Tease to Please approach. Now, as I said before, for such an invaluable and easy to use technique (given to you FREE, I’ll add) the least you can do is to start putting it to use. I want to hear from guys who go out and start getting some action from the use of this.

‘Cause I’ll guarantee you one thing: You will get more responsiveness from women with this simple approach than ANY other tactic. More response = more practice. More practice = more dates. More dates = more sex. Or more relationships, or whatever it is you want. It all starts here.

Get more women in your life. THAT’S ALL THAT MATTERS.

Let’s hear from those out there who are ready to stop doing what doesn’t work and start learning to improve your odds. Write to me. Tell me what you did and how it worked. (But remember, if all you’re going to do is try to shoot holes at it without having tried, I’m going to cut you to shreds… This stuff WORKS.   Can’t wait?  Check it out now : CLICK HERE!

So let’s start developing some EXERCISES that will get you on the track to understanding how to meet women at any time and any place. All you need to do is open your eyes and set aside a couple minutes to speak with her, if that. This is going to work ANYWHERE you see a woman, and it doesn’t require you to memorize a list if openers, scenarios or anything else.

Teasing a woman, (like using David Deangelo’s Cocky Comedy) works because it short-circuits her usual reserve about talking to or meeting guys she does not know.  Most women have this “wall” and don’t even know it – it seems to be pre-programmed from birth. Then, when a guy approaches her, for any reason, she assumes you’re picking up on her. It’s what she’s gotten used to.

You have 3 seconds from seeing a girl to when you meet her and say something to spike her interest. If you wait – she has time to turn away, move herself, do anything she can to escape from the uncomfortable situation of being hit on again.

In that 3 seconds, you do this:

Look her over, and spot something about her appearance that you can comment on. Start with her shoes, and work your way up. DO NOT choose a physical body trait (like big earlobes, bubble-butt, giant breasts) to comment on. Especially not her overall attractiveness.

You find ONE thing that you can key off of and say something about that will give you and inroad. This is your ANCHOR. Once you’ve found it, you comment on it to her and smile at her, making strong eye contact.

Example: She’s got bright red shoes on. “Wow, those are … interesting shoes. My sister might like a pair like that. Where’d you get them…?”

Example: She’s got a black denim dress on. “My sister likes dresses like that. Where’d you get it…?”

(If you don’t have a sister, use ‘Aunt’ or ‘Cousin.’ You shouldn’t have to lie.)

She’ll say something like, “Oh, I got it at Macy’s” or something like that. You then nod your head and look at it for a second, as if you can’t make up your mind about it. At no time do you ever throw out the usual nauseating male flattery approaches, like “Oh, that dress goes so PERFECTLY with your cheekbones.” (There is a time and a place for flattery, and it’s NOT in an improvised meeting like this.)

Flattery is the scream for approval of the desperate guy. It’s like cotton candy – sweet for a split second, but disappears almost immediately. You want to dangle the PROMISE in front of her first.

You *almost* convey a look of inconvenience, that you went out of your way to comment on her alligator-skin shoes, or her denim skirt. The less she thinks you approached her out of sexual interest, the lower her guard is.

Don’t be insulting! Just be mysterious and ambiguous.

(Her next mental question is: “Gee, I wonder if he likes my dress? He didn’t say.” )

From here, you will bridge into the Tease portion of the conversation, and we’ll cover that in the next post. All there really is left to do is to keep her engaged in the conversation for just a minute or two, show some confidence, and walk away with her phone number.

Now, the typical question I get is “What if there’s nothing out of the ordinary about her?”

Simple: You make something up. There is ALWAYS something you can find when you look, and if it’s not readily apparent, you make it up. If she’s got clothes on you can find something to pick out. I recommend looking for jewelry, because every woman takes a lot of thought in selecting her jewelry.

For especially attractive women, you need to come on a bit differently, and it pays to use a combination of the negative-hit with this. I even recommend that when you get used to this technique, you use it exclusively on the hotties. When you’re comfortable with it, it makes more impact.

You say just one thing, and it’s so easy you’ll have a tough time forgetting it:

“Your dress/shoes/blouse/jacket/purse (whatever) caught my eye. I like the style, but I think you should try it in black, instead. You’d look better with it in black instead of gray.” (Choose the color accordingly.) You nod your head, again meeting her eyes full-on.

Her head will suddenly spin … “But… but… all the other guys said I looked like a fashion model with this on… What do you mean?”

By using these approaches, you’ve just flipped her trust switch in her head. You see, she starts out needing to find a reason to be interested and trust YOU – or she quickly categorizes you as a friend (FRIEND = non-lover, a woman you won’t be able to sleep with). If you just start talking to her neutrally, she’s wondering, “Is he safe?” For all she knows, you’re a nut-case looking to pull her into a multi-level marketing scheme. NOW, all of a sudden, she is suddenly told (by your words and actions) that you might not be so interested. You’re different – i.e., INTERESTING to her.

For the first week or so, if you’re feeling a bit nervous about approaching women, work your way into this slowly. Just use the intro line I gave you, and take it wherever you need. Hell, I’d even recommend you ONLY ask her the first part (“Where’d you get xxxx, my sister might like that …”), then say “thanks” and walk away. Get used to just chatting up anyone and everyone you meet. Take the pressure off for the first week or two, until you get used to the fact that WOMEN AREN’T GOING TO REJECT YOU LIKE YOU THINK THEY WILL.

You don’t need anything fancy or clever. You don’t need anything special to comment on. You just take WHATEVER she is wearing or holding and comment on it AS IF IT WERE different or interesting. Then, by virtue of following it up with a quick tease, you get her mind off her initial defense (IS HE SAFE?) and on to validating herself a little to you. This is the primary psychological underpinning of the whole “TEASE TO PLEASE” method. And I just gave it to you in a simple, workable format.

What most guys will do is to spend all their energy trying to climb over her initial trust hurdle, when they really need to focus on getting her to flip that switch in her head by making HER the one to present herself to you. (This will be more apparent when I explain the Tease portion in our next installment.)

Most guys will take any approach and shoot it down and find everything they can about what’s WRONG with it before they will go out and use it and make it work. My advice to you is to prove it won’t before you even think about coming back to me with a rebuttal. I know that I’ll get scads of letters asking me what to do in X situation or Y situation, because they’re ‘different’ somehow, but it makes NO difference. You only have to spot one anchor on her to comment about. I use it all the time, and it is very effective.

Just remember to keep things light and humorous, and never to insult.

ANYTHING can work, if you just use it in the right way. I just gave you the first half of a technique that works ANYWHERE, ANYTIME. On ANY woman. The best part about it is that it is simple, universal, and effective. All you have to do is to find your target, find an anchor, and start your Tease … (but only to please…)

In the next post, I will cover more tips for approaching women by Carlos Xuma.  I will cover many other focused approaches that you can use as well, from meeting her online, or at a dance class, or at a bookstore, or even Wal-Mart. You’ll also get the complete breakdown of the psychology to the close for the phone number. I’ll tell you where and when to use flattery, and how to mine the rich ore of women you see every day. There’s nothing you won’t know about meeting ANY woman ANYtime, ANYwhere. (I’ll even tell you what the single underlying reason is for a woman’s defense for all men that approach her, and how to bypass it.)

Now, get out there and start getting in the game. You play it from the comfort of the stands.

Stay tuned! It’s going to get good…
I’ll have the last half of this method to you soon.

Check out The Power to Attract Any Woman … Carlos Xuma’s Alpha Conversation & Persuasion

Naturally, this leads to guys wanting to figure out a way to meet women that involves no risk.  Well, you can always have your buddies pre-screen every woman you want to walk up to and say hi.  They could interview her!  “Hey – my friend over there wants to know if you are interested in him.”  OR – you could do like I did the first time I ever wanted to ask a girl out.  I sent her a note that said, “Will you be my girlfriend?  Check one.  Yes   No”.

Give me a break, it was 6th grade!

Ok, so maybe those ideas aren’t so great.  In fact, they are downright wussie.  It’s easy to see that, though, when you are reading it in black and white.

My point is, there is no way to meet a woman without taking some risks.  Trying to do so creates a mentality of “average-ness”.  Being average is NOT attractive to women.  Women want a guy who can create attraction for them, and that means being a strong, confident, powerful man comfortable in your own skin.

There are two things you can do to minimize the impact of rejection.  One thing is to use a little Cocky Comedy.  The other thing is to not take rejection so seriously.

Cocky Comedy is a technique for meeting women developed by David Deangelo.   What is it?  Cocky Comedy is technique for meeting women that uses humor that not only elevates attraction but establishes you as the alpha male.  What you do is you start busting on her from the minute you meet.  Joke with her, bust on her, keep her on her toes – and this will create attraction for her.

For example, tell her that you noticed she is nursing that drink like a 2 day old baby.  Or tell her she is going to have to work harder than that to get your attention.  Bust on her clothes, her height (NEVER HER WEIGHT!!!) her shoes, her laugh – whatever comes to mind.  Make it witty.  And after that, you give her a sign using body language that shows her you are interested in her.

So you get it?  You bust on her verbally – then with your body language tell her you are attracted to her.  It works like a charm.

Now – there is always risk involved.  What if you go too far and piss her off?  It’s the end of the world!!  Or not.  I, personally, choose the “not” option.  Remember – YOU are TOTALLY in charge of how things affect you.  Does it bruise my ego when a hot woman rejects me?  No – because I CHOOSE to move on and not even think about it again, because it does not matter.  She was probably a freak anyway!

Anyway – for more information on meeting women, click here!

You see, you can rehearse lines and act out scenarios in your head all day long, but this won’t cure your inability to approach women. The problem is that you need to work on your Inner Game. This is the crown jewel in David Deangelo’s advice for guys, and it is all about getting you to believe that you are capable of not only approaching, but also getting dates with beautiful, unapproachable women.

The Deep Inner Game is not about the women you want to date, it is about you. Before you even start memorizing pick-up lines, you need to get your head in the right place, and start believing in yourself. You need to begin by letting go of every negative experience you have ever had trying to pick up women. If you walk up to a woman with a killer pick-up line, but a defeatist attitude, you will never get anywhere! Women are not interested in guys with low self-esteem. Women love confidence, energy, and man who make them laugh.

When you approach a woman, you must convince yourself that she is very attracted to you, that she can’t wait to get your number, and that you are approaching her because she was looking at you. It isn’t necessary for you to actually feel this way- you basically are going to fake it until you have convinced yourself that it is true. Approach her as though you know that you will be going home with her number, and you just might.

You should adopt an alpha-male posture: shoulders back, easy smile, and full eye contact. Don’t overdo it!  When approaching women, flash a nice smile and make a positive comment that will get things going on the right track. Don’t compliment her, just  reflect on how great the DJ is, what a beautiful night it is, and so on.

Like anything else in life, approaching women takes practice. You will never get good at this unless you practice a lot. Part of practice means dealing with rejection, and this is something you simply have to accept beforehand. The good news is that the more you deal with rejection, the easier it gets, and the less frequent it becomes. As you practice your approach, your body language will actually begin to reflect your confidence and comfort, and it will make you irresistible to women. But don’t take it from me, get out there and see for yourself!