So what are the specific ingredients that make up this code or sequence, you ask?  It boils down to being different than the other men – different in an attractive and confident way.

So here are some specific things that you can do to make yourself MORE attractive to women.  After all, it’s much easier to date a woman who is already attracted to you by your behavior than to try to MAKE a woman attracted to you – which backfires with relentless accuracy.  Think of it like cold calling verses selling something to someone who already WANTS your product.

First of all – you need to get rid of the neediness and insecurity in your life.  WOMEN. HATE. THIS.  You will not attract a woman by trying to get attention, showing off or trying to get recognition from her.   In Double Your Dating, David DeAngelo says that “Insecurity and neediness are like hemlock and arsenic – either will kill your attractiveness when dealing with women” (p 49).

How do you project neediness and insecurity?  Insecurity shows up when a man does not feel comfortable with who he is or comfortable in a given situation. He acts tentative, weak, and unsure. He tries to put on a show of confidence which is obviously fake.   He says things that are out of place in an attempt to get approval.  Women have a RADAR for this.  They detect – then they AVOID.

So avoid the following behaviors:

•   Hanging on a woman. Don’t touch a woman or crowd her too much in the beginning.   Instead, lean back and let her become comfortable being around you.

•   Talking or saying negative things about women or past girlfriends. If you talk too much about past girlfriends or other women, or say negative things about them, a woman will judge you to be insecure.

•   Having emotional responses to things. If it’s obvious to a woman that you easily get upset about things, then she will judge you to be insecure or even dangerous.  Women do not like tantrums, so if you throw things, scream and swear when you are mad – you are going to be even madder when she dumps you like last week’s garbage for someone a little more mature and stable.

•   Looking to others to make decisions. Women like it when you decide what’s going to happen and then do it. If you are always asking, “Well, what you think I should do?”, “Where do you want to go tonight?”, and “What do you want?” you’ll come off as needy.  Just make decisions and go with it. If she has a different idea, she’ll let you know.

•   Saying or doing things just to be noticed or to get compliments.  ‘Nuff said.  Don’t do it.

•   Arguing. This is my favorite. Some people feel like they need to argue with EVERYTHING. If you’re one of these people, just realize that this is a clear demonstration that you’re insecure and needy. u may always be right, but being overly argumentative is bad for your sex life. Deal with it.

So, if you can avoid these behaviors and take David DeAngelo’s advice, you will find it much easier to project a healthy, confident demeanor that women will find very attractive.  Be relaxed, confident, stand straight and put your shoulders back, look her in the eye, be decisive and bust on her a bit (using Cocky Funny) and you will find that your “cold calling” days are over, and your dating life has really begun.

One of the things David DeAngelo talks about all the time in the Double Your Dating series is that women are attracted to men for certain reasons (and these are really reasons beyond their control).  Figure out these reasons and meet them, and you trigger a specific internal sequence in a woman, which is related to a primordial mating sequence that we are pre-programmed to have as human beings.

One of the ways to trigger this sequence is to be attractive to a woman in a “different” way.  David DeAngelo calls this being “Different in a preferential way” (Double Your Dating, p 48).   So a great way to formulate attraction and to have the women attracted to YOU and trying to vie for YOUR attention is to understand what the elements of attraction actually are.

One of the key elements to attraction for a woman is the element of masculinity (you can read about the others in the Double Your Dating eBook in depth).  What masculinity is not: dumb jock bullying other people weaker than himself around.  Masculinity is NOT treating women like objects.  Masculinity is not bullying or being obnoxious.

Masculinity IS, however, a quiet confidence.  It is an aura about you of INTERNAL power that tells a woman you are capable and adept.  A masculine man will look people in the eye, have a firm handshake, be able to take a joke with aplomb, and be able to provide for himself and those dependent on him.
There is a lot of talk about being the “alpha male”.  Many men misconstrue that, and believe this means you have to be the ringleader like Biff on Back to the Future, picking on Marty to look cool.  No.  What it means is that you are the provider, you are the protector, you are the one RESPONSIBLE for your group.  Women can SENSE this in a man, because this used to be what determined the primordial mating sequence we talking about earlier.  Some evolutionary responses may take a backseat in modern times, but have NO doubt, my friend, they are STILL there.

So take a close look at your life and your interactions.  Think about what David DeAngelo says about being different in a “preferential” way.  Learn how to take the confidence and the lifestyle of the TRUE alpha male and apply it to your life, and watch how your interactions with women start to change in a positive way.

One of the most powerful personal development methods you can use to alter the course of your life (your DESTINY, really) is through the use of QUESTIONS.

Questions cut through and clarify the current state of affairs, and they help you see what may not have been visible before. However, they can only do this if you have the guts to answer them TRUTHFULLY. The man who lies to himself can never see the world clearly, and will then subject every bit of his reality to illusion – like looking at the world through distorted glass. In the short-term, he’ll make himself feel ‘better’ about things by lying to himself, but in the long-term he’ll just ensure his own failure.

Success is fleeting when it’s based on faulty understanding.

Ask yourself a few questions to clarify where YOU are right now:

• Are you looking for just one woman to “settle down” with? If so, why?
• Do you want to sleep with as many women as you can? And why?
• Are you feeling that your skills in meeting and getting women interested in you are where you want them to be? If not, what are you doing to remedy this situation?
• If you know you want something (a woman, a new job, a more comfortable social life), what is stopping you from having it?
• Do you ever feel incapable of doing the things you know you need to do? Do you wish you had a “magic button” you could push that would get you in gear when you need to?

These questions focus on the one critical element of any drive to change your life: your MOTIVATION. Asking yourself questions allows you to find out what it is that kicks you in the ass and gets you moving toward your goals.

Without understanding what it is that drives you, you could spend your whole life saying something like this:
“I wish I knew somewhere to go to meet women.”
“I have the worst luck with women.”
“Yeah, I’ll be at work late. You know me – I’ve got no life.” (Even jokingly.)
“I’m happy being single.” (When it’s a cop-out for failures with women.)
“Yeah, I know, BUT…” (“But” what?)
“I’ll just rent a movie at home tonight…”
“I can’t find any women that are right for me…” (While only “meeting” one woman every couple of weeks or months at best.)

If there’s one person you have to tell the truth to in the end, it’s yourself, guys. The reality is that the ONLY way to improve your situation with women is to get out there and interact with MORE women. Of every kind imaginable. Friends, lovers, acquaintances, you name it. QUANTITY is the name of the game. MORE women means MORE opportunities. It’s a simple numbers game.

MORE women means more successes… and more failures. Remember that the sports superstars don’t just succeed more, they also fail more. But the failures aren’t failures to them, and they don’t mean anything to them. When you’re in a scarcity (and SCARED-ity) mindset, the failures hurt so much because they comprise a high proportion of your game.

If you meet 2 women and strike out with 1, that’s 50%. If you meet 10 women and strike out with 5, that’s still 50%, but you bet your ass you don’t care as much when you’ve got the other 5 saying “Yes, please.” Your RATIO of failures is the same, but you’ve just multiplied your successes by FIVE.

Pretty slick, huh? Let’s call this seduction math.

If the woman you’re looking for is one-in-a-thousand, guess how many women you’re likely to have to go through to find her?

“Uhhh…. heheh… Dude… I’m not good at math…”

Well, it would be nice if she showed up in the first ten or fifteen, but that’s not how Murphy’s Law works. If you have a 1 in 1000 shot, chances are your number will come up right around the end… say, Ms. 999 or Ms. 1000. So get busy.

If you find yourself saying “I’m just not lucky with women,” it’s nothing about LUCK. It’s that you aren’t exposing yourself to enough women to warrant MORE success.

EVERY question and problem works itself out if you approach enough women. EVERY bit of understanding and skill comes from the number of women you get into your life by taking action. Knowledge isn’t power – it’s only POTENTIAL. ACTION is what separates the men from the boys.

EVERY problem you’re having with your dating life right now can be traced back to some root causes, but most wind up being that guys simply don’t TRY enough. They don’t try, and they don’t succeed, and then they don’t ask themselves the all-important question:
What can *I* do to change this situation, instead of blaming something outside my control or sphere of influence?

And, that all-important follow up:
What do I need to start thinking in order to motivate myself to actually DO IT?

Ask yourself those hard questions. The difference in the quality of your life can be traced back to the decisions you make every day.

And every decision started out as a question.

Have you ever heard a woman ask the question, “Where have all the real men gone?”  I know, you want to just shake her and ask her what the HELL she is talking about, right?  Well, the thing is – it seems that this “sensitive revolution” has basically neutered the male population.

Some people attribute that to the fact that more and more men are being raised by single women.  Others say that we are all doing it to ourselves – taking everything out of life that might accidentally offend an individual’s beliefs – trying to neuter EVERYTHING (like taking “God” out of the pledge of allegiance, taking the discipline out of schools and making sure everything that we say is politically correct to name a few methods).

Whatever you believe – it’s happening.  Society is turning Namby Pamby – and the women are the ones voicing it, asking where all the real men have gone.   To try to find a REAL man, women have developed a screening process – a test, if you will, to see if a man is a real man, or a wuss in man’s clothing.

You’ll notice women doing this when they are exploring the possibility of a relationship with you – like on a first date, or when things begin to become intimate.  This is how the beautiful women separate the men from the boys.  She is trying to find out, basically, if you are an alpha male.

There are many forms tests can take, of course, but once you are familiar with a few of them, you will be able to recognize them for what they are, and PASS them.  She might ask you for a gift or something she wants.  She could act snotty or have a tantrum, to see what she can get away with, or cancel your plans without notice to see what you do.  She might even tell you that you are annoying her to see if you will change your behavior.  (By the way, I learned all this by watching David DeAngelo‘s program called On Being a Man!)

Now – these things may seem small to you.  However, to a woman, they are CRITICAL.  If you fail one of these tests, she is going to do one of two things – she is going to realize you are a wuss and not a real man and will walk all over you until she gets bored with you and then she will leave, or she will just realize you are a wuss and leave then.

So – how do you pass these tests and show her you are an alpha male?  Well, let’s imagine for a moment that you are a wolf – the leader of the pack, the alpha male who gets ALL the females in the pack.  If a female wolf came up tot eh alpha male and said, “Buy me this pretty trinket and I will give you the night of your life…” – what do you think he would do?  Would he go running off to the nearest wolf jewelry store and buy it?  Or would he laugh and say “Are you serious???  I hope not, because if you have not noticed, there are plenty of females in this pack besides you.”

Or, say for instance, one of the female wolves tells the alpha male that she is annoyed by something he does.  Does the alpha wolf say “OMG I am SO sorry!  I won’t EVER do that again!”   (I actually can see David DeAngelo cringing at that, sorry man!)  Uhhhhh – NO.  He will give her a playful smile and say, “Oh REALLY?” – and then he will do it again just to show her that she is not the alpha – HE IS.

And guys – this is IMPORTANT.  Women talk about Prince Charming – how they just KNOW he is out there and what all he will do for them.  But did you ever notice that Prince Charming has to know how to fight, how to keep the kingdom running, sweep her off her feet and take her to a destination of HIS choosing?  Prince Charming does not ask the Princess if she would like to be rescued today.  He takes charge and DOES IT, and she will follow.  If you want to learn more about being an alpha male, then take a look at David DeAngelo’s program, On Being a Man, and start giving women what they really want.

You see, you can rehearse lines and act out scenarios in your head all day long, but this won’t cure your inability to approach women. The problem is that you need to work on your Inner Game. This is the crown jewel in David Deangelo’s advice for guys, and it is all about getting you to believe that you are capable of not only approaching, but also getting dates with beautiful, unapproachable women.

The Deep Inner Game is not about the women you want to date, it is about you. Before you even start memorizing pick-up lines, you need to get your head in the right place, and start believing in yourself. You need to begin by letting go of every negative experience you have ever had trying to pick up women. If you walk up to a woman with a killer pick-up line, but a defeatist attitude, you will never get anywhere! Women are not interested in guys with low self-esteem. Women love confidence, energy, and man who make them laugh.

When you approach a woman, you must convince yourself that she is very attracted to you, that she can’t wait to get your number, and that you are approaching her because she was looking at you. It isn’t necessary for you to actually feel this way- you basically are going to fake it until you have convinced yourself that it is true. Approach her as though you know that you will be going home with her number, and you just might.

You should adopt an alpha-male posture: shoulders back, easy smile, and full eye contact. Don’t overdo it!  When approaching women, flash a nice smile and make a positive comment that will get things going on the right track. Don’t compliment her, just  reflect on how great the DJ is, what a beautiful night it is, and so on.

Like anything else in life, approaching women takes practice. You will never get good at this unless you practice a lot. Part of practice means dealing with rejection, and this is something you simply have to accept beforehand. The good news is that the more you deal with rejection, the easier it gets, and the less frequent it becomes. As you practice your approach, your body language will actually begin to reflect your confidence and comfort, and it will make you irresistible to women. But don’t take it from me, get out there and see for yourself!

There are several key concepts that are LAW when it comes to attracting women.   These are in no particular order, but they are each very important to understand if you want to know what makes attraction work – and use that to your OWN advantage.

Getting right to it – the first of these immutable laws is that Attraction is NOT a choice.  I know you have probably heard dating advice experts like David Deangelo or Lance Mason say that before – but the thing is – it’s true.  Attraction isn’t a choice.  You don’t look at someone and think, “Hey!  I want to be attracted to HER!”

The second law of attraction – the attractive people have the pick of the pack.  In particular – the hot women.  They can almost any man they want, right?  They know it.  Men tell them!  All the time!  Beautiful women are approached CONSTANTLY.  Every day – several times a day.  So try to see this from HER point of view – if she gave her attention to every Chuck Schmuck that wanted it, she could not get through a day.  So if you want her attention, you better earn it.

The third rule in attraction is that attraction does not always make sense.  Think about it.  Every woman wants a great guy to treat her wonderfully, bring her flowers and open doors for her.  But she gets him, and she loses interest in about two weeks.  Why?  She is not ATTRACTED to him.  Logically, she should be.  At the gut level – she is not.

Law four – STATUS is very important when it comes to ATTRACTION. Beautiful girls are rarely attracted to men perceived to be of a lower status than they are.  Being the Alpha Male is a must if you are looking to attract women.

The thing is – women are on the lookout for the man that sparks that attraction in her.  She may not even know what that “thing” is, but …I do.  That thing that women want is the man to be a real MAN.  Not a wuss, not a wimp, not a “nice guy”.  That may seem counterintuitive – but let me ask you this – how’s your current game plan working out for you so far?

What can you do to stop this attraction killing behavior?  There are a few simple steps you can take to get your cajones back and get the girl.  One – stop being NICE to attractive women.  No compliments, no pleasing her, no gifts, no crap just to make her like you.  As a matter of fact – bust on her a bit.  Tell her she is a brat.  Tell her she is being bad and you won’t talk to her until she can be nice. 

Two – tell an attractive women no at least once every single day.  Doesn’t have to be big – but when some hot woman asks you to hand her the newspaper at the coffee shop – tell her no.  Of course, you can wait a few minutes while she grabs her jaw off the floor and then give her what she was asking for, but just bust her bubble if you can.

Three – respect YOURSELF and grow a pair, you know what I mean?  Remember that you are YOU, and do not put aside your personality, your beliefs or your wants and needs for any woman.  Or anyone, for that matter.  Respect yourself and you will get respect.